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Author
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Topic: Dulce et decorum est...
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Tetisheri
Self-Made User
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posted September 20, 2000 06:01 PM
  
Back in the proverbs thread, DaveInACar asked me to post some Latin insults that I had made reference to. So heeeeeeeeere we go!Podex perfectus es.
You are a total asshole. De stella Martis vere venisti.
You are definatley from Mars. Stercorem pro cerebro habes.
You have shit for brains. Caput tuum in ano est.
You have your head up your ass. Futue te ipsum et caballum tuum.
Screw you and the horse you rode in on. Tu es stultior quam asinus.
You are dumber than an ass. Credo nonnullos hic mortuos esse.
I think that several people here are dead. Nonne aliquantulum pinguescis.
Put on a little weight, havent you? Flocci non facio.
I don't give a damn. Irrumator.
Bastard. Tua mater.
Your mother. Arbitror eam de planeta alia venisse.
I think she's from another planet. Spucatum tauri.
Bullshit. Fortasse modo opio addicta est.
Maybe she's just a drug addict. Utinam barbari spatium proprium tuum invadant!
May barbarians invade your personal space! Utinam logica falsa tuam philosophiam totam suffodiant!
May faulty logic undermine your entire philosophy! Utinam coniurati te in foro interficiant!
May conspirators assassinate you in the mall! Aspice, officio fungeris sine spe honoris amplioris.
Face it, you're stuck in a dead-end job. Filone ferreo maxillae tuae iunctae sunt?
Are your jaws wired shut? I got most of these out of a book called Latin for All Occasions. Gets funnier every time I read it, heehee. ------------------
Right now I'm feeling really full and sexually repressed.
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Owlet
Cereal Subunit
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posted September 20, 2000 06:12 PM
Solemnly hands over coupons worth 10 Owlet points, then falls over on the floor laughing.------------------
You're not the boy that you say you are: you come from outer space, you drive a rental car.
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jujuchimp
Self-Made User
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posted September 20, 2000 06:25 PM
I once got a tape from the library of latin which included phrases like "Do not rape me." and "Go to hell."I'll have to remember these and use them later on. IP: Logged |
Tetisheri
Self-Made User
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posted September 20, 2000 06:44 PM
Owlet points? Cool!Now I have to learn how to say "My continued existence has finally been validated!" in Latin. ------------------
Right now I'm feeling really full and sexually repressed.
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Loopy
Self-Made User
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posted September 20, 2000 11:10 PM
ROTFL!!!
This is the best thread EVER!
You know what's dancing around my head right now? Little men in togas shouting "Your mother!"
hee hee heeI need to think of an excuse for those to go on my webpage ------------------
//Loop-de-doo -- PigLatin
the Pig Sty sucks!
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Aiki
Self-Made User
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posted September 21, 2000 06:09 AM
For those who like their insults in Greek (Attic):balle eis korakas (balle eis korakas): Literally, "throw yourself to the crows," but usually interpreted as having the same intent as "go to Hell." (edited to put in the transliteration and because I can't get the darned anaspirant to come out right, so I deleted it, nyah) [This message has been edited by Aiki (edited September 21, 2000).] IP: Logged |
Toon
Shuttlecock
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posted September 21, 2000 06:29 AM
One of my all-time favorite Latin (non-insult) phrases:Quantum est praedium elle toga in fenestro?
or, How much is that toga in the window? Got that from the Conversational Latin track on the Ten-Minute University tape. Damn that one was fun.
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-=> Toon
"I think...I think it's in my basement. Let me go upstairs and check." -- M.C. Escher Nil editorum carborundum.
[This message has been edited by Toon (edited September 21, 2000).] IP: Logged |
Ghost Coder
Self-Made User
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posted September 21, 2000 10:44 AM
There's a website out there with slang and colloquial insults for many different languages. Some of the funniest ones come from the Macedonian dictionary.picka ti mater (pitch-kuh tee mater)
++ let me fuck your mother This is the most common swear in Macedonia da te seram (duh tee sae-ram)
++ may I poop on you It is used when a person is pissed off because the one to whom those words were intented to screwed up something reeaaly bad. KUR SE TRESE VO LADNA VODA
++ THE DICK IS SHAKING IN THE COOL WATER NEVER EVER SAY THIS WORD TO YOUR CLOSE FRIEND. da te mocam od keramidi (duh tee mo-tsam odca-ra-mee-dee)
++ may I pee on you from the roof Very strong, don't use it unless you are really pissed off (even then watch whom you are telling this to). da ti go fukne konj ( duh tee go fouck-neah koyn)
++ may a horse stick his dick well into you If you don't want your fascial description to be changed, DON'T USE IT!
[This message has been edited by Ghost Coder (edited September 21, 2000).] IP: Logged |
Loopy
Self-Made User
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posted September 21, 2000 03:03 PM
Bwaaaaaa-haaa-haaaa-haaaaa!
Those are TOO much!I've always been a big fan of the Spanish "Tu madre es una vaca" (your mother is a cow) and "Come mierdo y muere" (eat shit and die) I have a pamphlet somewhere that I picked up when I was on vacation that has such Italian phrases as "Don't touch me unless you have a condom." I'll have to find that later on. ------------------
//Loop-de-doo -- PigLatin
the Pig Sty sucks!
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Contessa Choculum
Self-Made User
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posted September 21, 2000 05:45 PM
An Engligh writer (co-author of 1066 and All That) had "cave canem" ("beware of the dog") on his doormat. When told burglars may not understand the Latin, he replied: "then they're not the sort of burglars we want."[This message has been edited by Contessa Choculum (edited September 21, 2000).] IP: Logged |
genuine artificial
Cereal Subunit
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posted September 21, 2000 06:34 PM
I love the title of this forum*...  I've been meaning to get my brother a copy of the Latin insult book, though I'm not sure if it's the same one Tetisheri has. Our seventh-grade Latin teacher announced that one day she would teach us the swears, and then proceded to teach us things like "By Hercules!" that, frankly, wouldn't curl your eyelashes let alone your hair. My feeble contribution:
pestis...pest
furcifer...scoundrel
caudex...idiot/blockhead I can swear in sign language, but that doesn't transcribe well. *"dulce et decorum est" means "it is sweet and proper."
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Well, with actions like that, it's a wonder you're not wearing an iron-plated codpiece. --tv's Spatch (Edited because I wanted to, and not because you told me to. *sticks out tongue*)[This message has been edited by genuine artificial (edited September 21, 2000).] IP: Logged |
sourwookie
Self-Made User
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posted September 21, 2000 09:03 PM
It is obvious that Genuine Artificial is a product of the Cambridge Latin Course. To him I have a few things to say:Ubi canis?
Canis est in via. Mattela est mater. Ubi Grumio?
Grumio est in culina. Furcifer!! Caudex!! ------------------
Photo by husband. The Sweet And Sour Wookie
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genuine artificial
Cereal Subunit
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posted September 21, 2000 11:22 PM
I'm a she, sourwookie, but yes indeedy.canis in via dormit. Metella in atrio sedet. Grumio ebrius est. ------------------
Well, with actions like that, it's a wonder you're not wearing an iron-plated codpiece. --tv's Spatch IP: Logged |
Jesse Dangerously
Self-Made User
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posted September 22, 2000 06:40 AM
from Wicked French for the Traveller:
(accents omitted, I am not Jesus Christ)Bande de chameaux!
You bunch of camels! Vous les paysans, vous avez des truffes a la place de cerveau!"\
You peasants have truffles for brains! Vous me rendez malade!
You make me sick! Je t'emmerde, espece de porc a la manque!
Kiss my ass, you type of worthless pig! Je n'en ai rien a foutre, espece de depuceleur de vierges.
I don't give a shit, defiler of virgins! Tire toi, morpion!
Buzz off, depraved crab louse!
(this was funnier before I learned that there was a creature called a "crab louse" and that the French didn't just have a word that combined the concepts of sea crabs and head lice for some reason) Leche-bottes!
Bootlicker! Va te faire foutre, fumier a l'haleine de roquet.
Up yours, dog-breath. On se reverra en enfer!
I'll see you in hell! Que les flammes de l'Islam consument votre train de vie degenere!
May the flames of Islam consume your degenerate lifestyle! random phrases from Wicked German for the Traveller:
(accents, umlauts, all omitted) Keiner konnte mehr Schwartz tragen also du.
No-one could wear more black than you do. Tut mir leid, aber ich kriege Pickel/Anfalle von Akkordeontonen.
The sound of an accordian gives me hives/seizures. Dein Atem/Gepfurze riecht wie hollisches Sauerkraut.
Your breath/gas smells like Sauerkraut from hell. Es macht mir nichts aus, vor einer Gruppe vollig nachter Fremder vollig nackt zu sein.
I don't mind being stark naked in front of a group of stark naked strangers. Gehe dahin, Ubler! Kehre zuruck in deine dreckige Hohle!
Begone, Evil One! Return to your filthy lair! Essen ist das letzte, was Sie brauchen.
Food is the last thing you need. Wer zum Teufel fliegt denn dann dieses Flugzeug?
Then who the hell is flying the plane? I'd love to type out more, but I risk missing work. Buy the Wicked phrasebooks, they're fantastic. [This message has been edited by Jesse Dangerously (edited September 22, 2000).] IP: Logged |
Purple Smurf
Cereal Subunit
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posted September 22, 2000 06:27 PM
Die dulci fruere.
Have a nice day.Si hoc signum legere potes, operis boni in rebus Latinus alacribus et fructuosis potiri potes!
If you can read this sign, you can get a good job in the fast-paced, high-paying world of Latin! Sona si Latine loqueris.
Honk if you speak Latin. Ne auderis delere orbem rigidum meum!
Don't you dare erase my hard disk! Catapultam habeo. Nisi pecuniam omnem mihi dabis, ad caput tuum saxum immane mittam.
I have a catapult. Give me all the money, or I will fling an enormous rock at your head. Gramen artificiosum odi.
I hate Astroturf. Furnulum pani nolo.
I don't want a toaster. Sentio aliquos togatos contra me conspirare.
I think some people in togas are plotting against me. Noli me vocare, ego te vocabo.
Don't call me, I'll call you. Cave ne ante ullas catapultas ambules.
If I were you, I wouldn't walk in front of any catapults. Canis meus id comedit.
My dog ate it. Illiud Latine dici non potest.
You can't say that in Latin. Vidistine nuper imagines moventes bonas?
Seen any good movies lately? Nullo metro compositum est.
It doesn't rhyme. Non curo. Si metrum non habet, non est poema.
I don't care. If it doesn't rhyme, it isn't a poem. Fac ut gaudeam.
Make my day. Braccae illae virides cum subucula rosea et tunica Caledonia-quam elenganter concinnatur!
Those green pants go so well with that pink shirt and the plaid jacket! Visne saltare? Viam Latam Fungosam scio.
Do you want to dance? I know the Funky Broadway. Re vera, potas bene.
Say, you sure are drinking a lot. Radix lecti
Couch potato Quo signo nata es?
What's your sign? Spero nos familiares mansuros.
I hope we'll still be friends. Mellita, domi adsum.
Honey, I'm home. Tam exanimis quam tunica nehru fio.
I am as dead as the nehru jacket. Ventis secundis, tene cursum.
Go with the flow. Te precor dulcissime supplex!
Pretty please with a cherry on top! Magister Mundi sum!
I am the Master of the Universe! Fac me cocleario vomere!
Gag me with a spoon! Te audire no possum. Musa sapientum fixa est in aure.
I can't hear you. I have a banana in my ear. Quantum materiae materietur marmota monax si marmota monax materiam possit materiari?
How much wood would a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? Nihil est--in vita priore ego imperator Romanus fui.
That's nothing--in a previous life I was a Roman Emperor. Recedite, plebes! Gero rem imperialem!
Stand aside plebians! I am on imperial business. Insula Gilliganis
Gilligan's Island Fac ut vivas.
Get a life. And the best of them all...
Aio, quantitas magna frumentorum est.
Yes, that is a very large amount of corn.
- PS
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Why yes Brain, but if the Kazon were advanced enough to have really big space ships with warp drive, how come they didn't know how to make water? I think the Borg are behind this. (edited because: Magister Mundi sum!) [This message has been edited by Purple Smurf (edited September 22, 2000).] IP: Logged |
genuine artificial
Cereal Subunit
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posted September 22, 2000 06:53 PM
*Standing ovation for PS*IP: Logged |
Loopy
Self-Made User
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posted October 01, 2000 09:18 PM
This is still my favorite thread.Just in case anyone was wondering. ------------------
//Loop-de-doo -- PigLatin
the Pig Sty sucks!
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Loopy
Self-Made User
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posted October 01, 2000 09:43 PM
Here are the Italian phrases I mentioned way up where whenever...Ciao bello/a -- hey babe
Sono ubriaco. Per favore portatami al mio albergo. -- I'm drunk. please take me to my hotel
Come hai detto che ti chiami -- what was your name again
Dove sono -- where am I
Lo vuoi rifare -- do you want to do it again
Hai un profilattico -- do you have a condom
Spegnere la luce -- put out the light
Sbrigati perché perdo il treno per Parigi -- hurry up or I'll miss my train to Paris
Non toccarmi se non hai un profilattico -- don't touch me if you don't have a condom
Ma é vero che gli italiani sono i migliori amanti -- is it true Italians are better lovers
Dimostramelo -- prove it ------------------
//Loop-de-doo -- PigLatin
the Pig Sty sucks!
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Tetisheri
Self-Made User
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posted October 01, 2000 10:19 PM
My favorite (non-comedic) latin phrase:Timor mortis conturbat me.
The fear of death disturbs me. I really like that there's a subtle dual interpretation. ------------------
Right now I'm feeling really full and sexually repressed.
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Toon
Shuttlecock
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posted October 02, 2000 06:05 AM
There's an Ogden Nash poem -- one of his very few I Am So Depressed poems -- that includes the line Timor vitae conturbat me.Ghod I love Nash. IP: Logged |
Toon
Shuttlecock
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posted October 02, 2000 06:05 AM
There's an Ogden Nash poem -- one of his very few I Am So Depressed poems -- that includes the line Timor vitae conturbat me.Ghod I love Nash. ------------------
-=> Toon "I think...I think it's in my basement. Let me go upstairs and check." -- M.C. Escher
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Jesse Dangerously
Self-Made User
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posted October 02, 2000 08:00 AM
Ogden Nash is quite seriously one of my hip hop heroes. A great influence on my rhyming schemes. Fantastic.I have an LP of him reading some of his work. It's terribly fun. Yes. IP: Logged |
Toon
Shuttlecock
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posted October 02, 2000 08:21 AM
I don't know how Mr. Nash would feel about being a "hip hop hero," but I'm delighted at the very idea.------------------
-=> Toon The entire world is a very strange carrot, but the farmer is not worried at all. IP: Logged |
SpicyJ
Self-Made User
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posted May 18, 2001 12:21 PM
*bump*Just cause they're funny. IP: Logged |
Bolingbroke
Self-Made User
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posted May 18, 2001 01:06 PM
Gratias tibi, SpicyJ! This thread is awesome!  ------------------
"Oh, I thought that was just a SINGLE entendre."
-- nebulous menace
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SpicyJ
Self-Made User
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posted May 18, 2001 01:35 PM
The only insult I learned in latin was the one about not letting the bastards get ya down.But, in a french phrasebook I found the following useful phrases: Where is the bus? and.. I can't move my leg. Why the hell would you need that one? You're lying under a collapsed bridge, flipping through the book, "I know it's in here somewhere...", and all the French ambulance guys are standing around thinking, "Why does he not walk?" Weird.
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Sandrylene
Self-Made User
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posted May 18, 2001 11:19 PM
wow, i use "bande de chameaux" all the time! (it was my favorite insult in seventh grade) i didn't realize it was popular. chouette!IP: Logged |
Lord Cavity
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 08:02 AM
There's a selection of bizarre lines from phrase books at zompist. I told a friend about the site because of the Welsh phrases (he's currently employed trying to get computers to understand spoken Welsh), and he was sufficiently impressed to seek out the book. He compiled a list of odd lines inexplicably omitted from the selection at zompist. This is it:Look! There's the Archdruid
Edrychwch! Dyna'r Archdderwydd Is he wearing pyjamas?
Ydy e'n gwisgo pyjamas? (and yes, those two do immediately follow each other) Are you married?
Wyt ti'n briod? Be quick in the toilet - I want to go
Byddwch yn gloi yn y ty^ bach - rwy eisiau mynd You wash the dishes, I'll wipe
Golchwch chi'r llestri - sycha i Move up - I'm almost falling out
Symuda draw - rwy bron cwympo mas
(It's interesting to note the presence of the informal form of the second
person in that sentence...) But you're not drunk yet
Ond dych chi ddim wedi meddwi eto What's the purpose of life?
Beth yw pwrpas bywyd? God exists
Mae Duw yn bod (the last three were found in the 'In the Pub' section) And, most excellently: Wait, I'm looking for the word in the phrase book
Arhoswch, rwy'n edrych am y gair yn y llyfr ymadroddion Followed immediately by: It's not here - this book is bloody awful
Dyw e ddim yma, mae'r llyfr yma'n uffernol
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JohnnyCanuck
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 10:14 AM
But you're forgetting the most useful German phrase ever!Die ist eine sehr grosse Krake. That is a large octopus. ------------------
I just had my car's alignment checked. It's Chaotic Evil. IP: Logged |
Amsterdarn
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 03:40 PM
Beth yw pwrpas bywyd?
Dych chi ddim wedi meddwi eto!Dunno If I removed the right word, though... IP: Logged |
Rabi'a
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 03:53 PM
all of the arabic curses that i know are pretty standard. insulting someone's mother/sister is very common.but, one of my favorites, which isnt a typical arabic threat or anything, just a random thing that i picked up, is "hamaltu damak ala kafee" and means "i hold your blood in the palm of my hand." vaguely threatening. i like it. but, i can say lots more threatening things in arabic. i knew how to say, "i went to the village on my camel and massacred all of its inhabitants" before i knew the word for 'bathroom.' arabic is whacked.  IP: Logged |
Angel Fish
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 05:19 PM
I know someone who got in a large fight by referring to a German as a "Kartofflehoffen" (excuse the spelling) - as far as we could tell that means 'potato-head', but perhaps it has a more sinister connotation that we're all unaware of....------------------
BAD BORG! Back to your Cube! IP: Logged |
Acsumama
Shuttlecock
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posted May 19, 2001 09:44 PM
I have decided that it would be great to be able to say "I went to the village on my camel and massacred all of its inhabitants" in as many languages as possible.Fue al pueblo en mi camello y masacré a los habitantes. I think. My favorite wacky foreign phrase is "Qarachayllaña," which is Quechua for "It's just like skin!" It's a big compliment when applied to someone's weaving. ------------------
"Acsu, you may be the Swedish Chef." -- Element97
Potato God -- EMSP -- Lore 2000 -- Personal IP: Logged |
Bolingbroke
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 10:00 PM
French: Je suis allé au village sur mon chameau et j'ai massacré tous ses habitants.Latin: Ivi in pago ab camelum meum et trucidavit incolas omnes. I think the Latin is correct. I doubt I'd be able to find the Old English for 'camel,' so I won't try today. ------------------
"Oh, I thought that was just a SINGLE entendre."
-- nebulous menace
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Third from Left
Self-Made User
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posted May 19, 2001 10:02 PM
Timor mortis exultat me.IP: Logged |
Rabi'a
Self-Made User
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posted May 20, 2001 06:19 PM
"thahabtu ila al-quran ala jamalee wa qattaltu kulu al-ashkhaas hunak"
thats one way to say it in arabic.my word for village might be off though. it's been a long time. *sigh* and im too lazy to look it up right now. but, as an extra, "shabahu al-jamal" means "ghost camel." throw that around for fun. i always do. IP: Logged |
Toon
Shuttlecock
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posted May 20, 2001 06:47 PM
If anyone would be willing to translate the following phrases into Latin for me, I would be much obliged. (Welsh would be nice too, but only if you include a detailed guide to pronunciation.)Why is this night different from all other nights?
In that on all other nights we eat leavened or unleavened bread, but on this night only unleavened bread;
In that on all other nights we eat various greens, but on this night bitter greens;
In that on all other nights we do not dip our food even once, but on this night, twice;
In that on all other nights we eat either sitting or reclining, but on this night we all recline. Thanks in advance.
------------------
-=> Toon "Not now, honey, mommy's making a sharp pointy thing."
--IsMaryann IP: Logged |
Wondrous Fnordia
Self-Made User
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posted May 20, 2001 07:29 PM
GLEE!I have long loved my ability to spout off phrases in 8 different languages...
However, I can only spell in 2 of them, so no go for here...
*pout pout* Need German?
Ich bin ein Berliner.
Of course, that's only in the literal sense. Anyone know of a good Welsh pronunciation guide, and/or a way to learn how to affect the accent? ------------------
"I shall whacketh thy rump! I shall whacketh thy rump!"
-Roup
[This message has been edited by Wondrous Fnordia (edited May 20, 2001).] IP: Logged |
Bolingbroke
Self-Made User
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posted May 20, 2001 08:11 PM
Toon, here's what I came up with:Cur haec nox diversa ab omnibus aliis noctibus est?
Quod omnibus aliis noctibus edemus panem fermentatum aut non fermentatum, sed hac nocte edemus solum panem non fermentatum;
Quod omnibus aliis noctibus edemus holera varia, sed hac nocte edemus solum holera amara;
Quod omnibus aliis noctibus non tingimus cibum nostrum etiam semel, sed hac nocte, bis;
Quod omnibus aliis noctibus edemus aut sedentes aut recumbentes, sed hac nocte recumbimus omnes. Edited because I have something relevant to post. ------------------
"Oh, I thought that was just a SINGLE entendre."
-- nebulous menace
[This message has been edited by Bolingbroke (edited May 20, 2001).] IP: Logged |
Sandrylene
Self-Made User
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posted May 20, 2001 10:05 PM
a good way to effect a welsh accent, you say?
keep some water in your mouth while talking. :ÞIP: Logged |
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