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Author
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Topic: Product Slogans
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elisandra
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 15, 2001 12:58 AM
  
Lean Cuisine
"It's not just lean, it's cuisine"
I don't know what these people were thinking when they came up with this gem. It's just plain redundant. What if other companies started creating slogans in the same vane? Lemon Heads, "They're not just lemons, they're heads!" and Pizza Hut, "It's not just pizza, it's hut" come to mind. Let's try to use some words that aren't already in the product name, guys. D+Lactaid
"For the Love of Dairy"
For one thing, this slogan sounds like some kind of exclamation in the defense of a wayward barn animal. And I'm sure God feels great about his name being replaced in this common phrase with the mention of large milk bearing mammals. But in spite of myself, I find it fun to yell this at passing cars. A- Dr. Pepper
"Dr Pepper makes the world taste better"
Ok, this just makes me think of pouring Dr. Pepper on just about everything and licking it off. How does this park bench taste? Now, how does it taste drenched in Dr. Pepper? How about this golf shoe? And full of Dr Pepper? It seems that if we were to put this slogan to the test, our world would just be stickier. There's a slogan for you, "Dr. Pepper makes the world stickier." C
Dream Cast
"It's thinking"
Can't someone sue these punks for false advertising? It's a video game system. If you have a Dreamcast, you're not anymore sophisticated or adult. Or maybe they mean the Dreamcast itself is thinking? That's just creepy. I guess that would explain the twisted game, Seaman- the greatest marketing scheme to hit the video game industry, that is, if the game didn't actually suck algae. F
Bubble Tape
"Six feet of bubble gum, for you, not them."
That's right, time to teach our children two important lessons with one tag line. Gluttony, and selfishness. Kids already have a natural desire to horde sweets, do they really need additional help? And can you imagine trying to eat six feet of bubble gum all at once? You're likely to end up six feet under. C
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TheMadDefenestrator
Self-Made User
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posted September 15, 2001 06:09 PM
Can we get someone to say "for the love of dairy" with a scottish accent a la Groundskeeper Willy? please?
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Nevah Altavaris Entitar
Self-Made User
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posted September 15, 2001 06:09 PM
Have a little *boot*eyness for insulting Seaman... That game is a surrealist's paradise. And it talks. It says cool things.IP: Logged |
Ricia
Self-Made User
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posted September 16, 2001 08:59 PM
"Dr Pepper, it makes the world stickier*ROTFLMAO!!! Do the Dew: Ridiculous commericals, vaguely perverted slogan B Think Different: Slogan of Apple. It's think differently you grammar challenged fucknuts! No wonder Bill Gate is kicking your asses. D It's What's For Dinner: No, unfortunately it's not what's for dinner. It's what's for somebody else's dinner. We're having chicken again for the four billionith time. Can't afford beef C..cause I like the guy's voice -Ricia IP: Logged |
MsChilePepper
Self-Made User
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posted September 16, 2001 10:35 PM
That would be Sam Elliott on those beef commercials. I swoon over his voice, too. And, frighteningly enough, so does my Mom. :-/~~~~~~~~~~~
Jeanine IP: Logged |
Clickie
Cereal Subunit
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posted September 16, 2001 11:17 PM
Once more, the obligatory defense-of-Apple statement from Apple zealot/employee (and grammar freak) Clickie:It's not that we're supposed to think differently than the average person; we're supposed to think different, like "think big" or "think pink." You see the difference. You're not supposed to think in a pink fashion, you're supposed to be thinking about pink things. Likewise, we're not thinking in a different fashion, we're thinking about different things. See? (edited to add that having my beloved company referred to as a bunch of "grammar-challenged fucknuts" (emphasis mine) is downright insulting. Now I'm very mad. I never use profanity of that magnitude in my conversation and I'm mad enough to quote directly. That's pretty mad, for me.) (edited to issue a grammar lesson for Ricia: If you're going to challenge someone's grammatical correctness, maybe you should check your own grammar first. Your sentence should read "It's 'think differently,' you grammar-challenged fucknuts! No wonder Bill Gates is kicking your asses. D") [This message has been edited by Clickie (edited September 16, 2001).] IP: Logged |
elisandra
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 17, 2001 02:43 AM
What have I started? :P Let's all play nice, Apple has enough problems aside from their grammar.IP: Logged |
Illuminator23
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 17, 2001 11:17 AM
Obey your thirst, drink sprite: Yes, because my thirst repeatedly demands that I drink something that's vaguely lemon-lime flavored and gives me heartburn. My thirst says "Mountain Dew: Code Red". C-Choosy moms choose Jif: So if your mom didn't choose Jif she didn't love you? That's kinda shallow advertising. They might as well say "if your mom bought you Peter Pan, she wants you to DIE" D- cause at least it's not Scrappy. Where do you want to go today?: I don't even know if Microsoft still uses this one. But my answer's always been "Somewhere else, but I hate Mac's even more than I hate Windows...Dammit." D+ We put the dot in dot-com: A Sun employee told me that they've changed it to "We put the e in the new economy" or something like that. I think they just need to hire more creative marketers. C We create worlds: This is Origin's slogan. Best known for Wing Commander and Ultima. I have to admit that they do create worlds. But never having been an Ultima fan, they were always worlds that I flew by at 400 kps and didn't get to land on and see, or worlds that I flew over at 400 kps and blew stuff up on. Fun games, innacurate slogan. A if you like Ultima best or B if you prefer Wing Commander IP: Logged |
Miyu
Self-Made User
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posted September 17, 2001 05:57 PM
"Make 7-Up Yours": A-Yeah, I know I'm lame. ------------------
"Roses blooming at the Ends of the World, to me!"
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Harry_Tik
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 17, 2001 10:16 PM
Like a Rock: Chevy
A perfectly accurate slogan, although not the best for advertising. I had a Cavalier for a couple years, and it's now sitting dead in a garage. Like a rock. However it's rockness dosn't apply to collisions, where it crumples like an accordian made of triscuts. But I have a feeling "Like a Triscut" would cause legal issues, and dosn't have a song associated with it, so I'll give the slogan a : C------------------
How can Ace be one AND eleven? What kind of God would allow that?! --Ack IP: Logged |
Paddywhack
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 17, 2001 10:25 PM
No..No..good, make that excellent, choice. Who in the name of all that is holy decided that they could sell more products by indirectly insulting the consumer? Is this marketing campaign even working? 7-up has been behind for so long, if it wasnt for bars, no one would even know it exsisted. I miss the ganja imbibing Jamaican extolling the virtues of the "Un-cola" Damn....I think I just dated myself..... D-- [This message has been edited by Paddywhack (edited September 17, 2001).] IP: Logged |
RedTwo
Self-Made User
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posted September 18, 2001 08:43 AM
Dating oneself is, at least, less expensive than dating someone else.Is it just me, or did that bald Jamaican guy laugh just like Count Von Count? ------------------
Lore> I want to go to the Jehovah's Witness paradise, 'cause you get to pet baby pandas. babybabble
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Paddywhack
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 18, 2001 07:38 PM
Another in line with the latest 7up slogan is a print ad for Chupa chup(sp?) a lollypop candy:Candy on a Stick.
You Suck. Hmmmmm. Makes me just wanna run right out and buy some. F IP: Logged |
Calilasseia
Scrappy Doo
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posted September 19, 2001 03:51 AM
One that truly had me wondering about the kind of world I live in appeared on the food that I feed my tropical fish with:"Tetra - Advanced Crisp Nutrition" Er, what marketing genius came up with this one? Crisps for Fish ??? Apparently it hadn't occurred to any of these people, that the moment you put crisps into water, they cease to be crispy. They end up as a soggy glutinous mass with all the appetising qualities of nasal mucus. The irony is, the fish food is actually a good product. My fish (and mine are very discriminating fish) enjoy it immensely. Yet it's spoiled by the kind of disptick marketing that in the world of cars would have people believing that BMWs were as desirable as the Ford Edsel. Product: A (as voted by my fish). Slogan: E. Only because I'm not sure if I can award a Z. ------------------
Live fast, play hard & die in a beautiful way ...
[This message has been edited by Calilasseia (edited September 19, 2001).] IP: Logged |
Bennyboy
Self-Made User
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posted September 19, 2001 12:37 PM
10 bucks says the slogan if not the whole product was designed in the US where "crisp" only means something that is crispy, and you're refering to "chips". Gotta love us yankees for screwing that language of yours up so much, eh?------------------
If you plan to shoplift please tell us
Thanks
-Kevin Smith, via a sign in Clerks IP: Logged | |
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